Another man dies in bitterness of soul, never having enjoyed anything good. Job 21:25
I believe, second only to depression, bitterness is something that plagues a lot of Christians.
We all get bitter from time to time. We become bitter over another employee getting a promotion that we thought was ours, we become bitter over the way our family treated us, we become bitter over our financial condition, bitter over the fact that we were abused by someone whom we treated with love. The list goes on and on.
I spent a lot of time in bitterness myself. I was bitter that being orphaned at a young age, none of my mothers or fathers family ever checked on me to see if I needed a thing. I was bitter over the fact that I lost practically every worldly possession in my divorce, including the house I had bought with my own money.
The bitterness led to self-pity. It was constantly the "poor little me syndrome."
Bitterness creates a victim mentality.
I am going to tell you what God told me, "Let it go." The only way to be free and live a peaceful, calm existence is to do just that.
I had to get with the Lord and surrender it to Him. I had to just say, "Here, take this bitterness, the pain associated with it, and my heartbreak over it Lord, and you carry it for me. "
When we stay locked in bitterness over the past or even what our status is now, we give too much of our power away.
There are things that come to each of us that can cause us
to be bitter. I have things in my life today that could cause bitterness if I
sat and dwelled on them. I chose not to. I chose to give it to God. I can do
that because I firmly, completely. believe the scripture that says "And we know that in all things God
works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his
purpose." Romans 8:28
I am able
to teach others and counsel today because of all the things I went through.
Therefore, they worked together for my good. These things in your life will
work together for your good also. When you let go of the bitterness, you become
stronger! You are no longer a victim; you are a conqueror of all things,
through Jesus Christ who gives you strength.
Now a lot
of us know what the Word says about forgiveness and mercy but we disobey the
Lord and dwell in bitterness anyway. When we do that, we are sinning. If we
don't forgive others we will not be blessed. We are disobeying the very will of
God.
In Matthew
5:46-48 we read this;
“For if you love those who love you, what reward do you have? Do not even the tax collectors do the same? “If you greet only your brothers, what more are you doing than others? Do not even the Gentiles do the same? “Therefore you are to be perfect, as your heavenly Father is perfect."
As hard as it is to be good to those who hurt us, we have to do it. With the holidays coming up a lot of us will have to spend time with family members who have hurt us. Some of you are thinking, "I am not going to speak to them, I will go there and I will ignore them."
I know that kind of thinking, as I spent years trying to make others pay for the hurt they had caused me. You want to know the truth? The only person I was hurting was myself. These demons from hell got more pleasure seeing that they were still "getting to me."
Bullies and mean folks only get power from thinking they are "getting to you." Ignoring them, smiling and having a great time in their presence is more annoying to them.
I began to see that I could go around them. I began to see they had no power over me. I knew that I was a blood bought daughter of a King. Like Jesus said, "I have overcome the world, be of good cheer."
We overcome our pasts by being who we are in Christ. We are no longer sniveling, little victims. We are Kings' kids and we need to let others see that change in us that came about as we accepted Christ and let Him renew our lives for the better.
Acting or reacting as the world does has no place in the life of a Christian. Nothing feels as good as walking the talk does. Seeing that change in you may just be what changes someone else. They see that you are a walking miracle, whose life has been miraculously changed and they want to know HOW.
It's not about us anymore; it's about Christ who lives big in us. When we walk into a room people shouldn't see us, they should see JESUS. We don’t have to walk around saying, "Praise the Lord," we don't have to say a word. We just have to walk in love.
If we are still seeking revenge on everyone who hurts our feelings, we are displeasing to God. We are told not to seek revenge!
"Do not say, “I will repay evil”;
wait for the Lord, and he will deliver you."
Proverbs 20:22
As a shepherd of a flock sometimes I have to say to a person, "Don’t' go that way, don't do that." Just as a shepherd guides the sheep with his rod, so a minister guides those he or she ministers to.
Sometimes people get uppity and they don't like what I am telling them. I have two choices, tell them what God says, and risk them being angry or tell them, "Yes, go right ahead and do it your way," and risking their blood being on my hands on Judgment Day. So I tell them what the Word says, and sometimes they get mad and never speak to me again. They say all kinds of nasty things about me, but God defends me, and puts a hedge of safety around me.
I say that because I know some of you feel justified in remaining bitter and angry over your past. I am not telling you that I don't understand that, I am just telling you that God wants us to do it His way. Until we surrender our will to His, we will forever walk in bondage to our pasts.
Father, Give us the strength to do it YOUR way. Our way always leads to misery and dysfunction. We have tried that for years. This time we ask You to walk closely by our sides. Hold us up by Your strong right arm! Give us victory over the emotions that keep us from moving forward in Your Kingdom living! In Your Name, the Name above all names we pray. Amen and Amen.